Change - The only thing constant

Dear Friend,

And the beat goes on... we've had joy, we've had fun, we've had seasons in the sun! And somehow, we have finally reached the day my blog reaches its 200th post :) remember when I started off, I didn't even know if I'd go past 50. I have written four times as much and it doesn't seem like its going to end anytime soon. Sure, this blog has had its periods of hyperactiveness, sometimes it goes into hibernation mode, but through thick and thin, this has been MY BLOG, my friend, my everything! This is where I come for guidance, somehow writing here makes my thoughts a lot clearer...

This blog has also been awesome for me to get into a bit of introspection. I know too much of it is bad for my health (:P), but this has been just the right amount. This blog has seen me grow out of my insecurities and become the person I am today. I started off as a fresh undergrad in Singapore, today I am a graduate student in USA! I have come a long way! This blog has heard me think out aloud about my career options and every other thing in my life. If anybody has the patience to read all my posts, I think its safe to assume that that person will know a great deal about me!

This blog also saw me finding an awesome friend in Singapore and making all the right choices (amidst all the mistakes) and today my blog knows how much I miss that special friend. I miss you a lot. I miss our gang and somehow wish I could turn back time and relive all our amazing moments.

More than anything, that's the main reason why this blog is awesome for me. All I need to do is take a trip down to the vault... and voila, I am there with you again! This is why I blog, my dear friend, so that several years down the line, I will be able to re-live every precious moment of my life.

And its all thanks to you that I have this wonderful treasure with me...

Here's to another 200 posts and more!

Love,
MG

Rats!

I have started my second rotation in a lab that works on a field that is almost totally alien to me... NEUROSCIENCE!!! I have been more of a protein biochemist who likes to express proteins in E.coli cells and then purify and characterize them. I have some knowledge on protein structure-function relations, protein folding, enzyme kinetics etc etc, but believe me, I stayed away from neuroscience.

So what inspired me to suddenly try this out? Suddenly out of the blue? Well, it was on somebody's recommendation that I went and met this professor. I figured, whats the harm in meeting. Its not like I am going to commit to anything, not even a rotation. So I took up an appointment and went to see her. And she turned out to be one of the best people I have ever met! Her love and enthusiasm for her work was so infectious, I just had to be a part of it! So I committed myself to joining her lab for a rotation... in spite of being neuro-illiterate, in spite of not having worked with animals, in spite of all the odds against me, I took a bold step forward (if I may say so myself)

And I find that I don't regret it! Its an awesome lab! And today I got to do something entirely new. I worked with mouse brain sections, put them in order and mounted them on slides, then I went with the grad student who will be mentoring me to handle rats! I held a real, live, white lab rat in my hand!!!! It was kinda ok, sorta like holding a tiny kitten (something that I am very much used to). And I have decided that I love the lab, love the prof, love the people and love the science.

But at the end of the day, we all know that nothing is perfect. There has to be a catch somewhere or the other.

Somehow I am wondering if the ethics behind using animal models will come in my way, should I eventually decide to join this lab long term... Will I be able to sleep with a peace of mind? Maybe I will get used to it, it didn't seem so bad today.

But the question still lingers on in my mind.... I guess only time will tell.

I will have to wait and see. Hope and pray

Girly girl strikes again!

Yeah I know, my posts are getting kinda repetitive :P But I don't care! Because this is my blog and it reflects my life as I know it at this point of time.

Its common knowledge that macho girl has been growing into a girly girl (as soleil put it, from MG to GG!). As days go by, I am beginning to realise just how profound the changes are!

For the first time in my life, I am actually looking forward to pay day so that I can go out on a bit of shopping to expand my otherwise lifeless wardrobe.

Any tomboy would know that making the transition from that to girly-ness is not a task to be done alone. Actually, even if I wanted to, I CANNOT do it alone because I wouldn't know where to start!

While I was in Singapore, I had Clueless, Soleil and CS to help me out. I got an awesome red top (thanks CS! everybody loved it!) and a sexy denim skirt!

I was worried my transition would remain half done after I moved to Dallas. But looks like its my destiny to become the person I was meant to be!

Ady, I love the person I am becoming now thanks to you! Thanks for helping me out and being so patient! I know I am ignorant as of now about a lot of things, but I promise you, I am a fast learner! Just have some patience for now :)

Maybe someday, I will pay it forward :)

P.S.: This post is specially dedicated to Ady who has made life in Dallas super awesomely special for me! Babes, I don't know what I would have done without you!

Grain of salt

Disclaimer: Post for crystallographers!

I have done my first rotation in a structural biology lab. And I have dabbled around with X-ray crystallography and NMR. I have come to learn that you can't always rely 100% on inferences made from crystal structures because the protein structure is not representative of the structure in solution. Bottom line, take in all the results and discussion from crystallography journal papers with a grain of salt.

I have also learnt that asking a crystallographer to take life with a grain of salt isn't really a good idea...

Because a grain of salt could be the difference between crystallization and precipitation! :-\

P.S.: another reason why cooking is better than lab... adding a few microlitres or milligrams extra of any component is not disastrous in kitchen. I can deal with bigger quantities and approximation instead of teeny tiny portions with accuracy :-<

New experiments

I have heard people say that those who work in lab usually make good cooks. Especially chemists and biochemists.

I have realised that's kinda true :P Atleast I love my own cooking! And the best part, I find cooking so easy! Its probably because I treat the recipes like protocols. And cooking is just another lab experiment for me where I optimize the conditions for the best results.

The biggest and the most awesome difference between lab work and kitchen work is...

At the end of cooking, I get to eat my experiment :P :P :D :D :D

Photographs

I will never again roll my eyes when some person in a group interrupts the fun and celebration going on to stop and take a picture. I shall never ever underestimate the value of random photographs that we take when we are jobless and need something to pass time.

I've been living in Dallas for only 2 months now, yet Singapore feels like a life time away. I was having a conversation with Ady earlier and commented in passing about how I never expected any phone calls or wishes on Diwali. I didn't think anybody would remember to wish me.

So I sat down and began to study for an upcoming exam. And before I know it, two of my closest friends from Singapore ping me on gtalk to wish me on diwali! And to end a convo with a genuine, bottom of the heart "Love you loads and miss you loads" just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to know that my friends in Singapore are also thinking about me the way I think about them!

After talking to these friends of mine, I went to my photo collection on my hard drive and started looking through them. And all the memories, right from first year in NUS, came flooding back. Suddenly, Singapore doesn't seem like a lifetime away. I just cannot believe that its not a part of my present right now. I can't believe that my dudettes aren't just across the hallway anymore. And its diwali. In addition to missing the festivities at home, I miss sharing the home sickness with my gang in Singapore, where we became each other's family to sail through stormy seas. Just the photographs were enough to take me back to a time when Singapore was my second home.

I made some pretty awesome friends as an undergrad. And I am proud of them all. And of course, I miss them like crazy. But life is all about moving on, right? We all have our own lives to worry about. We knew right from the start that undergrad was just a 4 year deal. So why feel sad or depressed thinking about the good times that will remain as mere memories.

Everybody keeps telling me not to expect to find friends as awesome as undergrad friends at any other point of time in life. Everybody says that those days are as good as it gets. Beyond undergrad, friends aren't that close to you anymore. Until you get married, you wont have that best friend in your life. If that's what life is all about after undergrad, then I don't want to live such a life where I don't have friends to care about, to love and to pamper!

All I can say is that I refuse to believe what everybody tells me. I make my own rules for my life. And this is what I say now...

Its high time I brought out a camera to start clicking snaps of this new life of mine! Because, a few years down the line, these will be just as precious as those I have been clicking in Singapore for the past 4 years.

I will make sure that they become just as precious :)

Stinkin' truth?

What am I supposed to make of this?

I reach the campus, walk towards the elevator and then get in on the first floor. There are three other people already in there. I get in, and at the very next level, all three walk out :-/

Possible reason 1: They were all on their way to the cafeteria

Possible reason 2: I need to consider change of deo brand :-/

Let me just assume it was reason 1 and get on with life :P