Sunday, August 13, 2006

Forwarding the message

I hate forwards. But then again, who doesn't?? I admit that every once in a while I do get a cute forward which makes me smile or go "awwwww" or a really hilarious one which I end up forwarding to my friends. But more often than not, I get pretty irritated with the forwards. You can't express what you truly feel about a person by forwarding a stupid email or IM! If you want to show someone you really care, then find another way!

What inspired this post? It was a mail someone forwarded to me which just said "if you don't forward this mail immediately to 20 people, someone you love very dearly will die. I don't want anyone of my loved ones to leave this world so I am forwarding this to you". How nice of you. Well... fine... so you want to create a chain mail or something like that and are trying to make people forward it. But seriously, can't you think of anything else? Its a pretty sadistic way to create a chain mail, if you ask me...

Another very popular email is the friendship one which gives this nice aww-worthy poem and then at the end says "if you don't forward this to so many number of people, you will lose your best friend". Well, excuse me, but if you don't mind, I think my best friend will decide whether to leave me or not when I cross my limits or something. Let her decide. This stupid email doesn't have to tell me about what sorrow my friend is going to bring into my life. That mail filled more than half of my inbox quota! And the same goes for bad luck in love or my "boyfriend" ditching me.

Once, someone forwarded this email to me about bloody mary. No, I don't mean the drink bloody mary. I mean the horror movie character who is supposed to live in mirrors. What kind of pleasure do you get out of scaring people to forward that digustingly scary mail to others? Apparently, if I didn't forward the mail, bloody mary would get angry and then kill me the next time I saw the mirror. Look at me guys! I am still around! (touch wood). And yes, I do look into the mirror every single day. (ok ok... I admit... I was damn scared after I read that mail and had to flee to my friend's room to calm myself down. But I didn'f forward it coz I knew it was pure nonsense. Plus I didnt want to scare my friends for no reason)

But here's the lighter side... some forwards I guess are meant to be serious... but they sure as hell make me laugh till my tummy aches!
Have you got the whole "love story" thingy forward? Well, I have. And this should be proof enough that just because you don't forward something to 20 people life becomes worse. Check out what my "love story" is! (the stuff in blue are the thoughts that ran through my head when I first read the story and the words in green were the words I was asked to type out, like adjectives, names, nouns etc. while the love story was being written)

One tall summer day (how tall? :P) at New york you see the most beautiful creature (what species? :P) you have ever seen. Their name is Brad Pitt (just one will do, thank you very much) , and every move he makes just turns you on more and more. You nudge your best friend Tom Cruise (HAHAHA!) and say, "Wow, that has to be the most Handsome guy I have ever seen." Suddenly, he looks in your direction and starts walking right towards you!!! he says, "I noticed you staring at me from over there. I just had to tell you, that I think you are so fat (what the hell?!!! *slap*), and was wondering if you'd like to go to Paris with me and write (a blog post? :P) ?" With a stupid smile on your face you say, " What the hell! " and go with them (them???!!! I said one would do!). When you finally get to Paris , he moves closer to you, and is about to kiss you when you feel a tree hit you on the back of the head (*ouch* Next time, the noun I choose will be "feather"). You open your eyes to find out it's all a dream (or nightmare?), but there is a note left next to your bed.

It reads: " Brad Pitt is the love you've been waiting your whole life for (yeha right!). he will ask you out in 6 days or less (I can hardly wait), but only if you send this e-mail to at least 10 people within the next few minutes. The more people you send it to, the sooner they (*sigh* fine.. if you insist.. I will wait for "them") will ask you out, and you both fall in love. Do not take this lightly, because if you simply ignore this, you will have bad luck in love for the next 6 years!"

And trust me folks, even if I did forward this to people, Brad Pitt would never ask me out! (not that I want him to anyways). But to be fair... this was kinda hilarious :P

The point... please stop forwarding mails to me unless you think I will find it hilarious or aww-worthy! Don't threaten my life, my non-existant boy friend's life or the lives of the people I love. Its not funny. Its a pure waste of time. Next time you need to find a way to express that you care, then instead of forwarding these mails to me, just pick up the phone and call me. Yeah, its a bit more expensive, but I will appreciate that much more and I will also do the same. Thank you very much.

Now excuse me while I go and spend some time with my best friend Tom and my boyfriend Brad. Don't tell Angelina where I live!!!


Clueless said...

Ha! This forward seems like fun! I know it's going against the entire post, but psst...could you forward this to me? :P

Tom Cruise as your best friend! Bwah! I'm still laughing my guts out! Were you the one who gave him the "jump on Oprah's couch and appear insane to the whole world while proclaiming your love for your 20-something girlfriend" advice? Bad, bad girl. /:)

double head said...

Grow up and grow out of TOM and BRADD. Tom is too old and Bradd is too taken already. The FORWARD is funny, I liked it. I wonder if I should fill in the blanks in green and red with my own fantasy?

prithz said...

Oh... i share the same fellings as u... but, thnk god.. i am not tortured by such forwards...(hope no one is listening)... hehe :) but i hate those last few lines that they plug in... even, in case of some nice forards,i plainly go thru the forward i simply skip from reading the last usual lines, askin us to forward or else, thi-that....

Confused Soul said...

Hahahahaha.. Even I hate fowards.. But I end up forwarding them to a few friends most often :P :P
Ohh check this out.. I got this as a forward too!! It's hilarious!

"I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003 & 2004 & 2005 & 2006.

Because of your kindness:

* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting
on a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using
deodorants because they cause cancer.

* I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes. I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phon! e for fear that
they may ask me to dial a stupid number and then I
get a phone bill from with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for
fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and

* When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl, no
matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me
to a hotel, drug me then take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce
account. A sick girl that was about to die in the
hospital about7,000 times. (Poor girl! she's been 7 since 1993...)!

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made
expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their sp ecial e-mail program would arrive soon.

* My free Nokia phone never arrived and neither did
the free passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland.

* Still open to help some from Bulgaria who wants to
use my account to transfer his uncle property of some hundred millions $.

* Made some Hundred wishes before forwarding those
Ganesh Vandana, Tirupathi Balaji pics etc… now most
of those 'Wishes' are already married (to someone else)


If you do not send this e-mail to at least 12477896
people in the next 10 seconds, a flying cow will SH** on your head today at 6:30pm."

soleil said...

I think you hit the nail! I too hate forwards that threaten or curse me if I don't forward the forwarded email to many more people who will also be threatened or cursed. But as you said, there are some that really make you smile or roll on the floor laughing. Just recently I sent one to Clueless but there was a problem with gmail so i couldn't send it to the rest of you. The title was "Why Americans hate Indians" haha. I told Clueless to forward it to you girls if she found that it was worthy.

puttas said...

ooooooooommmmmmmmmmggggggggg!!! i did this one too... but trust me... mine wasnt as funny as urs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh man! i was rotfl!!!! brilliant... bloody brilliant!!!