Santa left me a little something for Christmas!!! Well... actually I got the present only the day after christmas but what the heck.... its a Christmas miracle!!!! :)
I kept cribbing to anyone who would listen about the release date for the exam results. What were they thinking?!!! The results were released right after Christmas! What if the grades were bad? It would take the fun out of Christmas! I was terrified at the thought of my exam results. I was terrified even before I wrote the exam and after that too! Its better to feel a bit tense about the results before the exams because it sorta motivates me to push myself and also, there is that window of hope... the paper might not be as bad as I imagine it to be! Its horrible once the exam is done and the paper was indeed as bad (or worse!) than I imagined it to be. Thats the story of my fifth semester exams in a nutshell.
I was never this worried about exam results. If there is one thing that I am really good at, its making schedules for myself during the study week and sticking to the timetable. And I make extremely ambitious schedules. Some people say I overestimate myself, but that has never stopped me. This semester was different. I made my usual schedule, but unlike previous semesters, 25% of the schedule remained unfinished. And in the remaining 75%, I crossed out another 25% without even touching the topic.... just so that it would look like I had accomplished something and to make me feel less guilty. Don't get my wrong here... its not like I wasted too much time during the study week (except for a few breaks and one freak out session with clueless!). Both of us studied very hard but there was just waaaay toooo much to complete. I felt very unprepared when I walked into the exam hall and had every reason to feel scared of my results.
But you must have already guessed what my results were. Afterall, I started off talking about miracles! Yes!!!! My results are wonderful! *touchwood*! I never expected this sorta thing to happen! I got an A+ in the module I least expected and an A in another module which I was sure I would get a B+ max! When I saw the page with my results, I refused to believe they were mine. My first thought was that the people at the university goofed up somewhere and mixed my grades with some other kid's grades. But such things don't happen (usually!). I just couldn't believe it! For the next two days, I had to keep announcing my grades to convince myself that they were really mine! My parents thought I was just bragging :P :P :P
The results were out on the 26th of December and I left for a 4 day long road trip the following morning with mom and dad. We drove to Kumbakonam. And its a well known fact that there is nothing to see in that region except loads of ancient temples and a famous chruch. In fact, on a particular day, we visited 7 ancient temples in the span of 3 hours!!! I love visiting these temples because the architechture is amazing! I have always wondered how they managed to lift the heavy granite stone that usually forms the top of the temple tower. What kind of technology did they have 2000 years ago to build such massive structures?! Even though I am a Hindu, I end up visiting these temples more as a tourist. Of course, when I am there, I do pray, but I would never consider this trip a "pilgrimage".
Each temple that you visit comes with its own myths and tales. You will never know if they actually happened because they are so delicately intertwined with facts and known history. There is no point in trying to figure out if the war in Mahabharath really happened by trying to figure out the dates of the eclipse and so on and so forth. You just believe. Because you want to believe. I don't know whether Karna was really born with his armour and all, but I want to believe, because his story teaches me something about generosity and friendship. The road trip to the temples around Kumbakonam reminded me that as long as you believe, anything is possible.
This trip gave me loads of time to think. It was full of long drives through the countryside and quiet contemplation. Maybe its not really a miracle that I got these grades this semester. Maybe it was just the bell-shaped curve that helped me out. Maybe its not necessary to study hard for some exams. Maybe sutdying smart is the key. Maybe along with the studying, all I need to do is to believe that I will remember whatever I learnt even though it seems like I have forgotten. Or maybe miracles do happen. I have no clue what helped me!
The lesson I take home from all of this? At the end of it all, believing is what matters. Whether its believing in myself or even miracles. Maybe if I believe in myself, I could do better. Or maybe Santa did leave me (and clueless!) a christmas gift as a reward for believing in Christmas and displaying our Christmas spirit by eating cakes! :P *winks at Clueless* In this coming semester, maybe I will try to have a little more faith in myself and see what happens. In the meanwhile, I will conclude this post and try not to think too much about how I got those grades. Afterall, they do say...
Never question a miracle :)